I've had a rough last couple days. I miss home. I rode my bike like fury for a little bit a couple nights this week when I just couldn't stand it. Had to get away to a little alone spot. Which for me ends up being a little dirt road behind the town that doesn't have lights beside it lighting it all up. I could just lay in the rocky dirt and look at the stars and imagine my God being up there looking back down and feelin for me. I bet He missed home too when He was here. Although, I'm sure He was more patient than me. I'm not staying for thirty-three years. I only have about six weeks left, and even that seems too long. If someone gave me the option of running away tonight and flying home I'd have to seriously consider it. I'd probably do it if it weren't for the feeling I'd have after five minutes of running, that my relatives here, Tia Susi especially, would feel rejected and terrible. And that I would have wasted the six weeks left. And that I wouldn't have fully taken advantage of and enjoyed all the time offered me here. After all, I have said it before and will keep saying it: I believe that this has been a gift of God. He blessed and now I'm here. It's been great. But there is Justin in India for an entire year, Tim in Europe for who-knows-how-long, there have been and will be others gone for much longer. I will have been here seven and a half months or so. Not too long. And yet I feel alone. I think I am just too much of a sucker to make friends. And that's my weak spot. It's big though.
Anyway, life is good though, I must admit. Argentina lost yesterday however, and that does make it a little less good. I have a job though, I have family and friends who treat me too well, I am still able to practice a second language, and best of all, there is this global network that allows me to have seemingly eternal contact with fellow folks from far away that I love. Awesome.
No comments:
Post a Comment