29.8.11

No reason

In the middle of my evening, while making some supper, I ran into a LIFE 9/11 slideshow of the most powerful images of that incredible day.  Clicking through the images led me to feel sad and awed, frustrated and impressed... angry and hateful.  I suppose that is natural.  The obvious question comes to mind:  How could other human beings hate so much to be able to commandeer planes and fly them into buildings full of people?

Then I realized I put the word hate in there because I hated them for doing it.  Maybe they they were doing it for reasons they felt were noble.  Or maybe they did hate.  Regardless, I find myself believing that with the right amount of time, and the right (i.e. wrong) circumstances and environment, I could eventually do something just as treacherous and evil, hate having nothing to do with it.

I feel pretty confident that won't happen.  But honestly, I'm curious about it.  How long would it take for me to change?  Is it even a change—or more of a gradual deterioration?  Could I become that person in the environment I'm currently in, perhaps by intentionally focusing on changing my ideas and thoughts?  I bet it could happen quickly, especially if circumstances were to suddenly change.

I've heard the opposite is true, too.  That I could become a better person.  But I've seen that that kind of change in myself can't happen suddenly, no matter what.  I am more naturally evil than I am good, because I am alive to survive.

For the next few weeks I'm sure I'll see and hear a lot more about September 11—a decade later.  It is the closest thing I relate to "being a part of history" that I have in my life.  I saw that happening on TV.  I lived through the political and economical effects of it.  Now I see the visual memories of it.

(Screen capture of one of the gallery's photos)

What are the decadal memories of me?  Do clear mental images also tip the scales toward hatred and anger?

Yes.  Unfortunately, yes...  Cue political and economical effects.